Here are my views on casual sex.
So far whenever I have had casual sex it has not been very good with people I don’t really want to be with. I have to an opportunity right now to have casual sex with someone who to be honest, I have at the moment have no intention to be with or to marry. She is too old for me and although we get along I don’t yet want to be with her long term. If we had a relationship it would just be friends with benefits. However I do not really know that. I haven’t got a set agreement with her that it is only for sex so therefore I do not know what is going to happen with us.
I have read a lot of peoples view points on this situation and how people perceive having sex with someone without commitment. In my own experience, it hasn’t been very good, the emotional pain and suffering after isn’t worth the hassle. The friendship can also get ruined when one person wants more. I wouldn’t care that much if we don’t have sex, if we don’t really love each other. It would be just for pleasure, everything the bible forbids. It isn’t something I really want but it might be fun in the right contents. But I have to think what would life be like without it? It would just involve patience and acceptance that it was better to wait until the right person came along. I haven’t had sex in about a month and to be honest it hasn’t been that bad. It isn’t like I need it like drink and food. It would be better to wait to have sex with someone you want to be with and you can do everything you want to do with her instead of the girl you aren’t that much attracted to. As when she finds out you are using her that could a problem. In my opinion it isn’t that much different to sleeping with a prostitute.
I will be honest with her and say I only really want to have sex with someone who I want to be with and that’s it. There are a number of reasons for this. One of them is that sex isn’t actually needed. Lots of people live a happy and healthy life without having sex. Secondly because there is a risk of catching a disease with someone who is sleeping around with other people. By having casual sex I am saying to her that it is okay to sleep with other people therefore she might catch a disease of someone else and give it to me. Thirdly because it feels dirty, like whenever I done and it has ended I just feel like crap and wish I never did it maybe because of these reasons.
Its not worth having sex with someone if you want someone else. You should only have sex with the person who you want to spend the rest of your life with. This will be the person you want to look after and the person who brings you peace. The person you really want to impress and make you sure they love you. If you want someone else you are better without it completely.
If it is okay to sleep with people casually then I cannot see why it wouldn’t be okay to sleep with a prostitute. The only difference is money. If you want to sleep with the person you are sleeping with then why do you want to find another partner? When what you got is enough. All of your other needs are just in your head. My dilemma is that I know someone who is twenty years older than me but am undecided whether to have a relationship with her because of her age when technically there isn’t nothing wrong with going out with someone older than me. She can do everything a younger, possibly more attractive woman can. It is a bold thing to go with a woman almost twenty years my senior but if she brings me happiness and joy then what is the problem? If sex is good then there isn’t an issue. It is just social pressures that are put on us. Like what other people will think of us. The truth is it doesn’t matter what they think. As long as we are both happy with each other, it will be okay. There are lots of people who go out with older women and have healthy, happy relationships.
I think this porn culture obsesses too much over looks and if we stay away from that we might realise that looks don’t matter at all as long as you are sexually attracted to them. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder as they say. A problem might come when I see a younger more attractive female available but the truth is that it would pretty much be the same with her anyway. I just may feel a bit more comfortable with introducing someone younger as my girlfriend to people than someone who is a lot older. But if the person who is my girlfriend has a nice personality it won’t matter anyways. The younger more attractive woman might become ugly as she gets older, then what are you supposed to do-just leave her. That doesn’t seem right. Really your life partner should be based on what is on the inside as that is what really counts long term. Whoever I go out with there could be potentially someone I am more attracted to this would never change.
I do however remember sleeping with someone older before and it didn’t feel that right. I will just have to see how it goes. If it doesn’t feel right and I feel I would be better single and free then I will remain that way.
With just having casual sex with random people you increase your chances of getting a disease and also somehow your soul gets destroyed in the process. Maybe not so for everybody but I know that it is wrong therefore I feel bad about myself and know it isn’t a correct path to take. This is only the case when I have sex with people that I know I don’t want to be with and there is no hope of it. This could be because I am not physically attracted to them or I do not like their personality. I am however, not really that fussy and as long as I like them and am somewhat attracted to them I would try out a relationship with them. If I keep rejecting women because they are not a ten then I might always be alone. If they have a brilliant personality this would make up for their not perfect looks.
I do however have a bit of dilemma as well at the moment of having deciding what would be the right action to take when it comes to masturbating over the phone to someone. I have done it before and to be honest it wasn’t really that good. Afterwards I felt a bit like an idiot and believe I am just better without it. I have a girl who isn’t my girlfriend and although I might want her as my girlfriend, because of Nofap it just feels a bit wrong to masturbate. This is because I will still lose all the benefits of not masturbating. I probably wouldn’t feel as guilty as masturbating to porn as it could improve my life somehow, for example it could improve my relationship with this girl but abstaining from doing it will not cause any harm as well. It is just me being myself and sticking with Nofap. Perhaps if I was sure I wanted her as my girlfriend or she was my girlfriend then I would be okay in doing it as I wouldn’t care as much about the benefits of abstaining from masturbation but as that isn’t the case I will actually care about losing the benefits.